I'm a big fan of westerns.  One of my favorite westerns is Gunsmoke, which not only represented the lawless old west, but American mores of the 50's and 60's.  In the end, you knew Matt Dillon would bring the bad guy to justice and escape maybe bruised, bloodied or perhaps with a flesh wound.  That's how we rolled back in the day, with the belief that our heroes sat tall in the saddle and that we lived through them.  We assigned the same trust to our athletes and political officials.

Now that Baroid Bonds has finally broken Hank Aaron's record, the public continues their outrage.  Oh, he was juiced, he cheated, he doesn't deserve it.  He's a loser, a pretender, how dare he.  People, the time has come for all of you to get over yourselves.

People cheat all the time.  Our current President was seated in office possibly due to vote tampering in Florida, a state where his brother was he governor.  Football and basketball programs cheat all the time in admissions, in players getting perks (as the Reggie Bush and USC fans break into a chorus of CSN's 'Our House').  And, if someone is good and doesn't cheat (Coach K) we dislike them and say "he must be cheating and covering it up."  That's why all of a sudden, Jose Conseco's implications that A-Rod may have been juiced have become a big national talking point as he heads towards knocking Baroid off his newly claimed mountain.

Barry Bonds has the personality of a rabid porcupine. The media loathes him because their sense of entitlement overrides the fact the man has no use for them.  He won't come on ESPN.  He won't buddy up to reporters.  He wants to be left the hell alone.  So, the media assaults him with venom. And that venom spews forth to fans who live vicariously through the print and television media and sports talk radio. 

Fans want their heroes to be pure, sort of like Superman in a baseball uniform.  The athletes we remember the most fondly are players like Walter Payton, Tony Gwynn, Cal Ripken and Wayne Gretzky; wonderful people who the media loved and fans loved because they represented the best of what we are.  No bad stories, no baggage, no rendezvous with strippers, no losing millions of dollars gambling (okay, maybe Wayne should step out of line here), these were good men who were great at what they did.  And their legend grows to grow long after they left the playing field because they continue to be accessible and they continue to be good guys.  Face it, wouldn't you love to have dinner with Tony Gwynn? Of course you would, because he seems like the kind of guy that would be really fun to hang out with.

Baroid, pardon the pun, is the Grinch on steroids. 

In our culture, we love the people like us and hate the people not like us.  Bob Knight is a brilliant basketball coach and the winningest coach in men's college basketball history, yet people despise him because he uses too much profanity, bullies his team and throws chairs.  Steve Spurrier and Nick Saban are brilliant and successful football coaches, but are, at least on the surface, smug, arrogant pricks.  Same with Coach K.   I always thought Scotty Bowman, the great hockey coach was a jerk until I actually met him after a game one night and he turned out to be one of the funniest coaches I've ever been around.  Guys like Bobby Bowden and Joe Paterno are beloved because they are like our kindly old grandfather ever though their usefulness as coaches probably expired long ago. 

The bad guy can't win.  That's counter to our nature.  That's WWE stuff.  The bad guy is our enemy.  You can't cheat to win, that's not the American way.

I, for one, could care less who the home run king is or how he got there.  There is nothing sacred or innocent in athletics anymore.  They are games played by millionaires or part time students that we watch and enjoy to distract ourselves from our daily lives.  Sports is the original reality show, a live, gripping, two to three hour event with no script and no predetermined outcome (with the possible exception of NBA games refereed by Tim Donaghy.) 

So to Baroid Bonds, I say, "congratulations on your achievement."  And to the rest of you, I say "get over it and move on."

Lightning Round

• If the White Sox can't beat Jake Westbrook last night, what are the odds they will beat C.C.. Sabathia tonight?  The answer is the only time C.C.'s name is mentioned in the same sentence with the word slim.
• 
  I got the Cleveland feed of the Sox-Indians game last night and missed the ramblings of Steve I'll show Hendry who's smarter Stone.  I fully look forward to it tonight.  My question is, how did Hawk deal with it?  Send me an e-mail and let me know.
  
• The Brewers lose again thanks to weak starting pitching while the Cubs lose but rid themselves of a bad Ohman,
• Robby Gordon is Cale Yarborough in a faster car.  God bless him for making NASCAR interesting. 
  
• The Bears trade away at least 20 nonsensical penalties.
• This is by far one of the silliest PR stunts I've ever heard of.
  
• Brady Quinn finally agrees with the Browns on a deal and will now enter the NFL to begin his career to rival such great names as Leaf, Harrington and Carr.
• I know I'll get e-mail about this, but I found this story really sad.  In another place and time, Wally Backman could have been the second coming of Billy Martin.  I don't condine Wally's ways, but I do think the guy has some ability as a manager.  It's too bad he's an idiot.  Think about this if you've been watching "The Bronx is Burning": Given what you know (or knew) about Billy Martin, would anyone have hired him as a manager in this era?  No, they would not have.
• When at the poker table of life, it's always easiest to reach up your sleeve and play the race card.
• Tennessee's Lamarcus Coker's inability to stay off the wacky weed probably just cost his university any chance at a BCS birth this season.  It also further strains the relationship between rabid orange fans and head coach Phillip Fulmer.
• The Mariner Moose avoids reckless driving charges by entering a plea of sorry.  When asked why he almost tagged a Boston outfielder with his all-terrain vehicle during Sunday's game, the Moose simply said "I'm cuckoo for Coco Crisp."  Memo to Curt Schilling: PLEASE, for the love of God, shut your damn tater trap.  This isn't about you, you sanctimonious, elitist piece of Moose dung.
• Looks like the Angels will have to rat out their concession stands.
• Thoroughbred race horse, $450,000.  Care, feeding, housing and staff, $350,000.  Not being able to name the horse after a former President's love slave, clueless.
  
• I've been backing off the politics lately because I'm trying to be more sports oriented.  That was just an editorial decision that I made (actually it was Butkus D. Dogg's idea.)  But when I see crap like this, I have to say something.  Al Sharpton says it's white people that run record companies that are causing black rap artists to use bad words.  Blaming white people for rap lyrics is about as accurate as blaming the sinking of the Titanic on the band.
• One more non-sports observation.  Get ready for the “spadominium.”
• Some of sports greatest zingers (mmmm, Zingers).