Hey, now, hey now.  I went 8-2 last week.  My only losses came because I picked the fat guy from  Indiana's team to win and because a ball bounced off some guy helmet.  Other than that, not bad. Overall, I'm 11-4, which is a good start. Hey, I'm a freakin' DOG, remember?

Taking my advice on football picks is a lot safer than putting Bobby Jenks or Scott Linebrink in a baseball game.  The bald guy was screaming something about trading their lard asses to Jenny Craig.  I'm not sure what he meant, but the fat dog, he got really nervous and hid under the coffee table for several hours.  I ate his food while he was under there!  Hah, revenge is mine says the little dog.

Oh, sorry.  The ADHD is kicking in.  Back to business. Five college, five pro, straight up:

College

• Tennessee vs. Florida:  There is an old saying we dogs have: Just because you bark the loudest it doesn't make you the pack leader.  Lane Kiffin has been barking his fool head off since December, but, clearly, Urban Meyer, Tim Tebow and the Gators are the pack leaders.  Kiffin and the Vols are going to feel like they were attacked by a pack of angry Pit Bulls Saturday afternoon. Take Florida HUGE!
• BYU vs. FSU: Dad Gum Bobby is going to get run over by a bunch of Mormons. And he's not even at the airport.  Take BYU.
• Nebraska vs. Va. Tech: Nebraska has improved a little bit, but they are certainly not your Daddy's Huskers.  Va. Tech played pretty tough against Alabama, so it figures they get the edge here. Yes, thanks so muchfor reminding me the ACC sucks.  Take Va. Tech.
• Georgia vs. Arkansas: Georgia has looked awful in their first two games against Oklahoma State and South Carolina.  Arkansas has played one game against a cream puff.  I'll take the battle tested team.  Take Georgia
• Texas Tech vs. Texas: This game sounds sexy but isn't.  Tech is missing a lot of their key components from last year and the Horns are looking for some payback from last year's loss.  The big difference is this game is being played in Austin and, as the Who once said, Texas won't be fooled again.  Take Texas.

Pro

• Minnesota vs. Detroit: The Elderly Hillbilly hits the free spot on the Bingo board.  Take Minnesota
• Cincinnati vs. Green Bay: The Bears defense made the Packers offense look bad Sunday night.  That won't happen two weeks in a row.  Take Green Bay
• Seattle vs. San Francisco: This is a big early season game for both these NFC West wanna be contenders.  I really like what the crazy eye guy has done with the Niners, but I think Seattle is a little better.  Take Seattle.
• Pittsburgh vs. Chicago: If the Bears can't beat a 3-4 defense with training wheels, how do you possibly compete with the league's best 3-4?  And Big Ben? And those receivers?  Looks like Lovie and the boys are in a bit a hole to start the year.  Take Pittsburgh.
• NY Giants vs. Dallas: Dallas is not as bad as they were last year, but they are not as good as the Giants are this year.  Watch out, Jerry.  Eli's coming!  Take New York