I can give you a million reasons why I would love to see the Bears dump Lovie Smith for Bill Cowher, but I can give you at least twenty million why it won't happen. It's just a dream, even though Cowher says the Bears are one of the teams on his radar.

Can you imagine Da Chin coaching Da Bears?  Not since the days of Ditka would watching a Bears game be so exciting.  Here's some reasons why Da Chin would be a great hire:

1) He's from that cradle of football in Pennsylvania that brought us Ditka and unfortunately Stuttering Dave.  But Cowher, unlike Wanny, can actually coach. And talk in complete, uninterrupted sentences without using cliches like "all the ahhhhh pieces are ahhhh in place."

2) Cowher is emotional.  The man wears his emotions on his sleeve like Jeremy Shockey wears tattoos on his arms. After five years of Dick Juron and six years of Lovie, Bears fans are dying for an in your grill, jump up and down, slam the clipboard to the ground kind of head coach.  Just to know their coach has a pulse. With Lovie, you'd need an EKG machine and paddles to find out.

3) Cowher is accomplished.  He'd be the first former head coach the Bears have hired during my lifetime.  Yes, that's right.  Every single head coach the Bears have hired since George Halas retired in the late 1960's has been an assistant with no head coaching experience.  In fact, Mike Ditka was a special teams coach in Dallas.  Why haven't the Bears ever hired an established head coach.  One word: $.

4) Cowher attracts good players.  Free agents would flock to Chicago to play for him.  Assistant coaches not named Ron Turner and Bob Babich would come to coach under him.  It's all good.

5) Cowher is straight forward.  No more Lovie Smith coach speak.  Cowher would tell you where the team stands in a forthright manner, perfect for Bear fans who still crave the brutally honest Ditka.

6) Can you imagine living in a world with Sweet Lou, Ozzie and Da Chin?  Oh my!

Unfortunately for Bears fans, the list against Cowher coming to Chicago is also a long one:

1) If the Bears fired Lovie Smith, they would owe him eleven million dollars.  That's eleven million dollars more than the Bears would ever pay a coach to sit out a season or do TV.  Can you imagine Lovie doing TV?  Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

2) Even with Lovie at the wheel and the Bears in the tank, there is no danger of the Bears popularity waining or the season ticket holders canceling their PSL's.  Why?  Because the Bears are beloved good, bad or mediocre.  If you can make money with a mediocre team, why spend the money to make it better?

3) General Manager Jerry Angelo could never work with such a high profile coach.  Cowher would want input into personnel and there is no way Angelo would cede it to him.  The only way it would work is if the Bears took out both Lovie and Jerry and that is not going to happen.

4) By the time the Bears fire Lovie, Cowher won't be around.  He'll have found another gig somewhere else (like Carolina). That will leave the Bears to find another assistant somewhere and bring them in as head coach.  Les Frazier, any one?