Happy Turkey day.  The Bald Guy is running around like a turkey with his head cut off.  He's cooking dinner for my grandma and grandpa and then driving it over to their house, two hours away.  He's making like 11 different things and it's like that show he watches called "Dinner Impossible."  Except the Bald Guy isn't English and the English guy doesn't have the fat dog as his floor cleaner.

In fact, just a few minutes ago, the fat dog ran off with a package of sausage.  Seriously.  You should have seen the Bald Guy, Mama and my other Grandma chasing after him!  I laughed until I peed on the carpet, which is a different story for a different day.

So, I hope that your Thanksgiving dinner is great and that a fat dog doesn't steal your sausages.  Damn, I just peed the carpet again.

Last week, I was 8-2 including calling the upset of Wisconsin by Northwestern.  Unfortunately, I also picked LSU and Stanford.  On the year, I am 81-34 which is something to shake a drumstick at.

Here we go.  Five college, five pro, straight up.  Let's rock and roll:

College

Alabama vs. Auburn:  The only thing standing between Alabama and a showdown with Florida in the SEC Championship game is Bama's arch rival.  Bama has a tendency under Nick Saban to get tight for big games, but I think they are way better than Auburn.  Take Alabama.

WVU vs. Pitt:  Even the Bald Guy thinks Stuttering Dave has done a great job with the Panthers this year.  if they can beat WVU, they have a huge showdown with Cincy next week.  Take Pitt.

Cincinnati vs. Illinois: Ron Zook and the Illini have been know to pull off a big upset from time to time.  Cincinnati probably could be beaten by several Big Ten teams (Penn State, Ohio State, Iowa) but Illinois isn't one of them.  Take Cincinnati.

Oklahoma State at Oklahoma: It's been a tough year for Bobby Stoops and the Sooners, so much so, he's being rumored to taking over at Notre Dame.  Those rumors usually get started by agents or wishful alums.  Oklahoma could at least salvage part of their season with a victory over OSU.  They will.  Take Oklahoma.

Georgia at Georgia Tech: After Saturday's game, Mark Richt will be on notice that one more year like this one and he'll be done at Georgia.  Take Georgia Tech.

Pro

Green Bay vs. Detroit: Unfortunately for people in Michigan, the Lions usually wind up like the Turkey on Thanksgiving day: Served up and stuffed.  Take Green Bay.

Washington vs. Philadelphia: The Eagles have found their second wind and are pushing for the playoffs.  The Redskins are a blind squirrel that occasionally find an acorn.  Take Philly.

Seattle vs. St. Louis: The game films from this one should be shown to political prisinors to replace waterboarding as a form of torture.  Take Seattle.

Chicago vs. Minnesota: This game is like a Brett Favre before and after picture.  The part of Brett Favre before Mike Holmgren will be played by Jay Cutler.  Favre will play himself as the after.  Meanwhile, Purple Jesus and the Vikings defense will add more nails to  Lovie Smith's coffin.  If you thought the Cincy and Arizona games were ugly for the Bears, wait until you see what Minnesota does to them.  Take Minnesota.

Pittsburgh vs. Baltimore: I wonder if Big Ben isn't hurting so bad he's dragging the Steelers sown with him.  I think the Ravens will play some big time defense and cause Ben some grief.  Take Baltimore.