I cannot figure out what people find exciting about soccer.  It's a game played mostly in the middle of an oversized field feautring two teams that can barely put the ball in a huge net.  That's exciting?  People get killed over this sport?  It must be from the boredom.

In my day, soccer was the sport mothers sent their little snow flakes to when they didn't want them to get hurt playing football.  Johnny would get to run around, kick a ball and avoid physical contact.  Johnny also got beat up a lot.  In fact, the only guys Johnny could ever manhandle were the guys on the gymnastics team.

No wonder those soccer announcers get so excited when someone puts in a goal and scream their fool heads off.  It's because they so rarely see one.

Speaking of announcers, how did you enjoy Mr. Belvedere's call of the game yesterday?  It's so cool to be watching a game in the U.S. called by some freakin' Brit.  Are you telling me that there is not one play by play guy from the US who could call a soccer game?  If there isn't, you have your answer about why no one in the US cares about soccer.  It's like listening a a baseball game in Spanish.

The game yesterday between the US and England ended in a tie, but you would think by the reaction it was a thrilling 5-4 victory in overtime.  If soccer fans truly get this pumped up about ninety minutes of action with only two goals, then they really set the bar low in their sport.

Honestly, for me, soccer comes as being tied to a chair and forced to watch Oprah, Dr. Phil and Springer as anything.  At least with Springer, something interesting may happen within the hour.

Me?  I'll stick to baseball, football and hockey.  Enjoy the world cup.  Just wake me when it's over.